EPA auditions…Equity Pricipal Auditions. these are auditions that a producer is required to hold under their Theatre Union (Equity) contract. what does this mean? well, in general it means that for every union show going up, regardless if it’s already been cast, the producer must hold additional auditions for union members. this guarantees that union actors will get a chance to audition and be seen by producers even if there are no roles available#–it’s sort of a handout to union members.

in reality, these auditions draw hundreds of unemployed actors hoping for a miracle. sometimes, it works out and you get cast from an EPA#–i have friends who have gotten work this way. but for the most part, an EPA is a chance to work on your auditioning skills and keep busy, and to meet a casting director or producer who you haven’t seen before.

however, i am not yet an Equity performer. i’m joining SAG in the next month or so, and also AFTRA (i’ve done enough work now that i have to join in order to get more work) but i’m not yet eligible for Equity#–which means i can’t attend an EPA. so how does a non-union actor get stage work? well, after a producer sees all of the available Equity actors for an EPA, and if they aren’t dead tired, they may see non-equity performers. MAY see them.

now comes the bit about The Cherry Orchard. the Atlantic Theatre Company held EPA’s yesterday for The Cherry Orchard#–i love that play and thought "why not?" i’ll tell you why not#–HUNDREDS of actors, HUNDREDS…all warming up their voices and flailing their arms in wild circles "getting into character" for their thirty second monologue. after checking the huge list of actors already signed up, i realized there was no way in hell i would get a chance to audition. so instead i went to the Drama Book Shop, bought the newest trade publications, and went home to work on a script.

i don’t mind auditioning. i don’t mind waiting to audition. but i do hate weird "actory" actors who do strange vocal warm-ups and acrobatics and refuse to speak about anything except how they know everything about the business and how to get work. ick. they need to watch "Lisa Picard is Famous". and chill a bit. or maybe i’m wrong. maybe i need to do some acrobatics.